WWE Schedule hit by Allegations of Unfixed Matches

A scandal has broken out in the world of wrestling entertainment after it was revealed that the result of a fixture last month was not pre-decided.

The fight in question was the opening bout of the WWE Smackdown! tour at the Home Depot Enormodome in Seattle between Johnny Nitro and Edge. Nitro comprehensively beat the World Heavyweight Champion in what spectators at the time were convinced was a poorly staged mock fight on a giant trampoline masquerading as a wrestling ring.

Suspicions were aroused when young wrestling fan Jimmy McNamara reviewed a mobile phone video of the event on the ride home. The video appeared to show Nitro making full body contact with Edge rather than standing to wait for his opponent to hurl himself over his shoulder onto a crash mat. Nitro and Edge are two of the sport’s biggest stars and are hugely popular amongst girlfriendless teenagers in both the US and UK.

Wrestling legend Hulk Hogan told thenewsentry.com that it is vital for the sport to distance itself from such accusations.

“I remember that at Wrestlemania ‘94 some guy accused me of not giving in when Earthquake attacked me with a chair. It was proved untrue but my reputation as a member of the WWF was tainted for a good few years. I got kids shouting abuse at me in the street and my fan club shrunk overnight. People know that wrestling has high standards as the world’s least competitive and authentic sport. If they wanted genuine spontaneous acts of violence they’d watch Duncan Ferguson.”

WWE president Vince McMahon says that Nitro and Edge could face a number of punishments if found guilty.

“We have never before come across a case with such clear evidence so any punishment must be decided upon. Ideas we are exploring include putting them in a ring with real Mexican wrestlers. If they want to get all competitive then let’s see how they handle two angry farmers from Chiapas. We’re currently checking the legality but I reckon that if we do it in Mexico it should be fine. I want to send a message to all WWE artists warning them of the consequences of unfixed matches.”