BBC to End Prejudice Against the Prejudiced

The BBC has today announced the creation of a new network of channels in a bid to grab a hitherto ignored demographic: racists.

A spokesman for the BBC Garth al-Habsi said, “A commission set up by the BBC found only one sector of society continually ignored by media outlets in this country: our hard-working racists. As part of our commitments to diversity and equality, we have created this network to be launched just before Christmas 2007”.

Mr al-Habsi, himself a racist as well as a wheelchair user, said Christmas was boom time for racism. “It’s this time of the year when racists join other members of the larger ‘anti-PC brigade’ to protest about the growing use of ‘Seasons Greetings’ ahead of ‘Merry Christmas’. It really winds us up,” he chuckled.

The first channel to be launched will be a digital radio station, BBC Racist. This will be followed by a section on the BBC website and even a digital TV channel if ratings are favourable. Jade Goody and Abu ‘hook hand no balls’ Hamza are believed to have been approached as potential presenters.

Dr. Bertram Greentoad, politics lecturer at the University of the North East Scilly Isles said: “The racist community have a long history of being shunned by the powers that be. This must be redressed or Britain’s commitments to tolerance and freedom of speech will be hollow. Hollow like a cave, or a prostitute’s vagina. If we don’t start letting racists speak, I may as well just wipe my arse with the Magna Carta.”

Original shows confirmed by the BBC include ‘Pub Banter’, a live panel discussion following the template of Question Time. However, it will take place in a real public house in Britain, with the panel comprising racist authors and critics. Discussions would centre on racist themes, such as ‘Is white indeed right?’ and ‘The economy wouldn’t collapse if all the immigrants left, honest it wouldn’t.’

Several pubs in the North of England are keen to be involved in the programme. Speaking exclusively to thenewsentry.com, Phil Renton-Smythe, landlord of The Eight Heads in Huddersfield said: “I’d love the extra publicity. Since the smoking ban the pub’s suffered a visible loss of customers. A bit of high-profile racism could be just the thing to boost business. My wife better not find out though, she’s part of that happy-clappy PC gang,” he snarled, foaming at the mouth.

Another show rumoured to be in production is ‘You’ve Got a Jew Loose’. In it, a member of Britain’s Orthodox Jewish community will be released undercover into one of Bristol’s ‘racist zones’. If he can keep his religion a secret for 24 hours he’ll win £360, one for each degree in a circle. A BBC insider denied any knowledge of the programme but admitted it was a “witty” concept.

People welcoming the announcement ranged from the leader of the British National Party (BNP) to the deputy-leader of the BNP. One human turd, a Mr. Kecks of Taunton growled, “It’s about fecking time; they’ve had tossing CBeebies for pissing years and toddlers can’t even wanking speak; not like us ain’t that bastard right boys?”

Mr. Kecks was later arrested and charged under the Human Organ Transplants Act 1989.